Monday, January 25, 2010

Clomid Observations

Having taken this medice for a cycle and gone through the subsequent period, I have a few observations to make.

1. I hate night sweats. Every night while taking the pills, I wake up drenched.
2. PMS + me = Royal Bitch.
3. Finding out still no ovulation - 3 days of on and off crying.
4. Period cramps much worse
5. Period shorter by a day. This was actually a GOOD thing, well at least I think it is.
6. My husband cowers in mock fear when I turn into above mentioned Royal Bitch. It doesn't help his case at all.
7. Wondering if it will work this time and questioning even taking it at all at this point causes even more worry, tension, and stress, none of which helps ovulation or TTC.

We'll see how things go this month and see where everything is at in 3 weeks when I get the next bloodwork results. However, I'm beginnning to question if I want to take this stuff for a third month or just go straight to an RE, after getting the referal so that I can go to an RE.

Friday, January 22, 2010

Results, Pt. 2

We have te results from my bloodwork. The clomid did not work. I'm being upped to 100mg and have 1 more refill after this. Then, we're off to the races, so to speak, on what ever path we are meant to take. I'm starting to maybe think about getting the name of an RE now. Maybe.

Thursday, January 21, 2010


Hello to everyone from ICLW! Welcome to my little corner of the internet. I am April. I have been married to P. for 2.5 years. My husband has a daughter from his previous marriage, J., also known as the young'un. She is 10.5 and is a delightful child hell bent on becoming a large bratty teen. It's fun.

P. and I have been trying to have a child of our own since we got married in 2007. We have recently gotten the diagnosis of anovulatory and have done a round of clomid just after the holidays. Unfortunately, we both became sick the week of baby making and no baby making happened. I'm at the end of the clomid cycle now, am waiting to hear back about my bloodwork so we will know if the clomid in this dose worked or if we're moving to a higher amount.

Since this is ICLW, here is a list of 10 things about me:

1. I play violin and have since I was 8 years old.
2. I crochet, a lot.
3. I'm addicted to Lego Indiana Jones 2 on the Wii.
4. I love to read and have at least 1 book in my purse most of the time.
5. I want to be on What Not to Wear just so that maybe I can look really good and get to go to NYC for a week.
6. I have never dyed my hair.
7. I do not buy shoes and purses. Instead I buy yarn like there is no tomorrow some months.
8. I wear bifocals and have since I was 10. I don't like to wear contacts so I still wear glasses.
9. I drink mint tea a lot. I have a cup sitting next to me now and will have at least 3 more today.
10. I am terrified of snakes. I can't even stand to see a picture of one, I'm so scared of them.

And that's all I've got. Please, feel free to wander about and poke around my blog. Thanks for stopping by!

Sensitive as a brick

Or why my Mom is on the list of people I'm avoiding at the moment.

Last night while I'm sitting on my couch indulging in my PMS foods of chocolate and sour cream and cheddar chips, the phone rings. First off, it's almost 10 and most people who would call me at home or on my cell know that I go to bed at 10 most nights because I'm up at 5:30. I look and see it's my parents and answer. My mom has called to tell me that she knows how to fix all of my infertility problems. All I have to do is go down to the hospital and tell them I'll take one of the orphans from Haiti. After all, the children are all here in Pittsburgh, and so am I! It's the perfect answer, to her at least. So now she's decided that I need to go and adopt one of these babies now. She even has pointed out that since they ones here are all between 1 and 4 years, there won't be any night time feedings.

I was in shock. While adoption may be the path we turn to in the future, it isn't the path for us at this moment. I'd also love to be able to go and help one of those children, but we can't afford the several thousand to adopt internationally at this moment. Hell, we don't even have a home study done yet because we aren't ready to move to adoption. But to have my Mom call me up at almost 10 last night to tell me that she had the answer to all my problems and that it was to drive to the hospital and just ask for an orphan, because you know adopting an international child is justn that easy.

I know, I'm sensitive to it right now because we already know the first clomid round will not be a success. I know that if adoption ends up being the path we take, we'll decide how and where we will adopt. But damn Mom, using a natural disaster as a reason to nag about grandchildren?

Thursday, January 14, 2010

I have a confession

Bless me IF sisters, for I have sinned. 1 year ago I bought yarn to crochet a baby blanket for the baby I was sure I would have by now.

Yes, I know. Buying things for babies of your own when infertile is a huge taunt. Yes, I knew this when I bought it, but I was in denial and the yarn was so pretty, and it was on sale. This is how I rationalized my purchase. I can be very rational in my own mind when yarn is on the line. However, I am confessing this sin now because last night after a nice huge fight with my husband, I went to my stash of yarn to pull out something new and pretty to start a project, even though I have 4 other projects in various stages in my crochet bag at this very moment. When I went to my stash, most of what I found were balls of cotton purchased to make baby bibs for presents (Yes, I make handmade baby gifts. I am truly a glutton for punishment), several hanks that needed wound and since I have no swift and I wasn't about to ask the man who had just pissed me off to hold it for me, those were ruled out, and a bag of yarn for a baby blanket. My baby's blanket. I pulled out the yarn and cried over it. Sobbed actually.

This of course brought about another fight with the husband. Why was I crying over some silly yarn? It was just yarn. He didn't understand that it was what the yarn symbolized. He didn't understand that I wasn't crying over the yarn, I was crying over the baby we didn't have while standing in the nursery that isn't a nursery. It's the computer room / junk room / non-existent spare bedroom. Last night it all hit me. Tomorrow I go for my day 21 bloodwork to see if the clomid caused me to ovulate. Even if it did, I know that the cycle is a failure because we've both been to ill to even really want to make like a bunny, let alone actually be able to perform said act.

So please, bless me sisters for I am in dire need either of having my butt kicked for buying for a baby I wasn't even expecting or for absolution because it was bought out of hope.

Tuesday, January 12, 2010

A Tale of Two Sickies

Or why I don't even have a reason to think about being pregnant this cycle. I started my clomid on the correct day and took my 5 pills in succession on days 3-7. All is well and we have the correct calandar days circled. On day 9 (Sunday 1/3), I start coughing a little, but nothing that seems to serious or even like it will even last very long. On Day 11, P starts coughing. I'm now running a fever. On day 12 (when we're supposed to start to be bunnies) he has a fever, I still have a fever, and breathing is a thing of the past. It turns out trying to have sex while on cold medicine doesn't work very well. Long story short, over a week later and I'm just now getting over my cold. P's cold developed into pneumonia and he's on some seriously strong medication and not allowed to go to work for another week. So no baby for us this cycle. It was a wasted round of clomid leaving us only 2 more rounds before we head off the the big RE whom has yet to be chosen because I'm seriously sticking my head in the sand over this whole clomid may not work for us thing. Friday I will have bloodwork drawn to make sure that this dose of clomid actually caused ovulation, but it doesn't matter if it did or not. There will be no baby this round. Finally tally of the cycle? Sickness - 2, Us - 0.

Monday, January 4, 2010

First round, down

On New Year's Day, I took the last of my 5 days of clomid. Now we're onto the fun portion of this program, if you see scheduled intercourse as fun. Sadly, P does not. However, he's ready and willing, so to speak. Now we have as much fun as possible this week, get blood work drawn next week to confirm ovulation, and then we wait and hope. If this one doesn't work, we have 2 more cycles of clomid left.

There has been a stroke of luck in our quest for a child. I accepted a new job in December. the benefits include adoption assistance after 2 years and IF testing and treatment for things that can be fixed are covered. However, it does not cover IUIs or IVF. But this does open more options for us. This means I can go to an RE if the clomid fails. We're really hoping the clomid doesn't fail. If it appears no biological child is in the cards, we will most likely pursue adoption. P isn't worried about a biological child since he has the young'un from his first marriage. He could care less if any children have his DNA or not. The same here. We just want to be parents. We will get there, one day.