Thursday, January 27, 2011

Fa.cebook g.ames and family building

I have admitted to my e-mail addiction. I'm also addicted to fa.cebook games. Oh yes, I have tried most of them at some point in time or another. Right now, I'm playing Frontier.ville a lot. I think it's because I can build the family that I dream of there. After all, you buy the missions, plant the cabbage, jump through a couple of hoops and POOF! There's a new baby.

I have Jamie, Ivy, and Tommy. Yep, I have mythological children. Since nature hasn't granted me the ability to create the family I have dreamed of, I guess I can thank z.ynga for allowing me to do this, right?

Sunday, January 23, 2011


Tonight while watching my beloved Steelers win the AFC championship (after making me think we were going to lose it in the second half), my mother in law shares that two of my husband's cousins are expecting. One is expecting her third and the other who has also sufffered from IF is expecting twins. So now she's bound and determined to have me knocked up ASAP. Because it works like that you know.


Friday, January 14, 2011

I am an e-mail-aholic

Hi. My name is April. (from the audience, "Hi April".) I am an e-mail-aholic. I obsessively check it multiple times a day, even though I know the chances are slim that anything has changes.

I check it first thing in the morning and last thing in the evening. I refresh, login and then logout again, only to repeat the process again 30 minutes later.

It's almost an obsession. I can't pinpoint when my addiction began, but blogging has made it worse. It makes me want to check my e-mail more often, just in case there's a comment out there.

And yet, I find I can go a weekend without even the desire to look at a computer, let alone check e-mail,, or even blogs. Why is it Monday - Friday I feel a need to be constantly plugged in and the weekends I don't?

Monday, January 10, 2011

How I spent my weekend

Or why I'm on the way back to the doctor's today.


My ear is infected again. This came about because of a nice Saturday spent going through the "Vatican Splendor" exhibit at the history center. Apparently it is not good for what is termed a medically fragile ear to be in the vicinity of a few thousand people in close quarters in a very warm environment for 3 hours. If there weren't a big hole in my ear letting in all kinds of wonderful germs, I'd of ended p enjoying the weekend more.

The tour was wonderful. I enjoyed seeing the different artifacts and learning more about St. Peter's Basillica and seeing some of the works of art that were on the tour. As a non-Catholic person, it was very interesting to see the different ways that St. Peter and St. Paul were portrayed. Being raised Protestant and marrying into a very Catholic family (Have I ever mentioned that in my husband's family he has an aunt who is a nun, a cousin who is a nun, and another cousin who is a priest? No? Well, he does and it does create some interesting conversations at times.), at times I feel confused when they talk about different things and symbolisms during Mass when we attend church there. This helped shed some light on so many things and at the same time as a lover of museums it was fun.

Sunday I read a book. Not just any book either. I started and finished Life from Scratch by our very own Mel. If you haven't read it yet, stop, go and get this book, and do so. It was a fun, quick, and very enjoyable read.

Today I"m back at work, it's CD2, and I really need to call and schedule my SHG. I'm not looking forward to this and have been dragging my feet because of the ear and the fact it will require surgery. Since I'm almost out of sick days, it'll be fun figuring out how to get the leave approved for the surgery since one must take 6 sick days in a row. Hjowever, that's one for HR to help me with when the time comes.

So how was your weekend?

Thursday, January 6, 2011

Jan. 6

Three years ago, I woke up feeling happy and excited. We were toying around with the idea of making an announcement at "Water Spaghetti" to P's side of the family, but decided to wait until we could tell both sets of grandparents at the same time. In hindsight, this ended up being a really good decision.

As we gathered everything together and made sure were were wearing our Steeler best for the afternoon football game at Auntie C.'s, I began to have some cramps. They were mild and I didn't think much of them since I'd been feeling the weird twinges and cramps on and off since I had my only positive peestick. As the day progressed, they turned worse and I began to spot. Then the bleeding began while we were at the dinner opening presents. We finished the evening with forced joviality with me being thankful that I hadn't emptied my purse yet and still had something for the bleeding. We took the Young'un home, stopped at a store, and I took a test. It was negative. You were gone, only tissue expelled as the week went on.

That first July was difficult as I kept seeing people with newborns everywhere. I wanted to be one of them. The second one was worse because I wanted to be planning your first birthday and wondered why so many others were blessed and we weren't.

We miss you. We love you.

Why aren't you here?

Monday, January 3, 2011

Jan. 3

Three years ago, I had begun making plans. Plans about how to tell my parents and my husband's parents that they were going to be grandparents. That evening, I noticed a little spotting, but wasn't too worried. After all, I was only 6 weeks pregnant and spotting is normal in early pregnancy. The internet told me so and since my own doctor didn't even want to see me for another month, so I wasn't worried. I should have been. Three days later, the world came crashing in and my baby was no more. If you ask the doctor, the baby never even had a chance, but I'll never know.